TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 2 2010
Welp, that’s it! The yoga inbox is cleaned out, the last satirical bits have been written and published, the mat is rolled up, the yoga studio is now an art studio and YogaDawg is quitting snarky yoga blogging to concentrate on his painting (Eight years ago I laid my brushes down and I vow never again. I declare onc.. READ MORE
My Itchy Third Eye  [edit]
Born around 1910 and abandoned to a band of roaming exiled bohemian intellectuals, opium addicts, Victorian harlots and other sordid hanger ons, YogaDawg began his Yoga journey by hearing drunken, debouched debates on the great Occult texts of the day. In the process of being immersed at an early age to these classics, along with the decadent literature and boogie-woogie of the time, YogaDawg, became interested in and fascinated by the methods and practices of these occult people, writers and musicians with their out of their bodies experiences; which they claimed transcended the physical body to put them in closer touch with the absolute. In the mid-1920s, YogaDawgs found a copy of the Karma Sutras that one of the flappers had left over one evening which inspired YogaDawg to become a Yogi. Beginning in the early 1930s, upon hearing about the great Jnana Yogi, Krishnamurti, YogaDawg set off for India to meet this most enlightened Yogi. Unfortunately at the time, not many Americans knew were India was so YogaDawg ended up in Indiana as he was told that's where India was located. Upon arriving in Indianapolis, YogaDawg inquired as to the whereabouts of Krisnamurti and the other Yogis. He was given blank looks and shakes of the head. Good fortune, though, would eventually shine on YogaDawg as he ran into a "carnie" that convinced him to join the circus. As YogaDawg explained, "That carnival barker told me of the wonders of the midway with their contortionists, magicians, fire eaters and others who were doing things more amazing then any Yogi. Through those years, YogaDawg would acquire many of the skills and wisdom of his circus peeps. As the same time, YogaDawg would not lose his desire to become a true Yogi. In 1947, YogaDawg went to India (finally consulting a world atlas) with the intention of studying with a real Indian Yogi. It was around this time that he began to pen his pivotal work, My Third Eye itches - A Yoga Guide. He would eventually become distracted upon discovery in 1950, one of the first American Yoga stars of the time, Richard Hittleman. Having absorbed the truths of Indian Yoga, spending the last few years in Mysore, YogaDawg decided to go to New York City, where Hittleman was located. He would sadly abandon his Yoga Guide for the next several years. On reaching the shores of New York, YogaDawg became involved with a group of abstract expressionist painters, jazz musicians and beatniks, eventually pioneering an early example of conceptual art. This period culminating in the work known as YogaDawg Howls. Unfortunately, this work was too avant garde and strange for art critics and the America public at the time and the piece was panned. Sadly, by 1961, facing failure as an artist and never having met Mr. Hittleman, YogaDawg sunk into a deep morose, began doing drugs and alcohol, suffered a sever depression and had to eventually be committed to Bellevue hospital for several years. YogaDawg, began his slow recovery back to sanity after watching Lilias Folan do yoga in her PBS-TV series "Stretching with Lilias" on a daily basis. He would meet Born and Maiden America at this time who would play a pivotal part in his later life. In the late 60's, YogaDawg, renewed, refreshed and inspired to restart his yoga practice and vowing to complete his famous tome, My third Eye Itches - A Yoga Guide, traveled back to India, this time to join the Beatles and the famous Guru star, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi and his Transcendental Meditation. As fate would have it, he never made it to Maharishi's ashram, when he had stopped to ask a wandering sadhu for directions to the ashram. This sadhu convinced YogaDawg that TM was wacked, just so much hooey and suggested that YogaDawg spend time in a cave alone in Himalayas to search within himself for the eternal Yoga truth. The next 30 or so years, considered the lost years by the two followers of YogaDawg, would find him in the cave. After reaching a state of enlightenment and perfecting a unique method of physical yoga, named the SuperDuperBlissInducer Super Bok Choy® method, YogaDawg was now honored by the neighboring hermits and sadhus by being given the name Sri Sri Swami Baba Guru YogaDawg. On July 4th, 2003, YogaDawg emerged from his cave with the purpose of spreading his Yoga method to the people of the world. Planning also to finish his now famous Yoga text book, My Third Eye Itches - A Yoga Guide, YogaDawg made off for Los Angeles at the suggestion of the wandering sadhus. Upon reaching LA, YogaDawg was stunned as he walked through the airport terminal as he spied a celebrity magazine with a woman doing a Yoga pose who when by the name of Madonna. He was equally stunned to realized that many Yogis before him had already established schools of Yoga, some going by such exotic names Iyengar, Ashtanga, Anusara, Bickran, Jivamukti and countless others. In addition, he found that the Yoga world had become saturated with Yoga Stars which left little room to introduce his Yoga method to the general public. Disheartened that he would not be able to establish his own Yoga School, he consigned himself to completing his famous masterpiece, My Third Eye Itches - A Yoga Guide, while holed up in a flea bag, flop house in the skid row district of Portland, Ore. Assisted by his two faithful disciples, MadDawg and his lovely wife HotDawg (formally Born and Maiden America), YogaDawg, today, leads a reclusive life living off his royalties from his book and t-shirt sales over the www.Yogadawg.com website.
RELATED BLOGS
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 2 2010
-- Poorhouse Dad
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 2 2010
-- The Mommy Blog
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 2 2010
-- Please Pass the Salt
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 2 2010
-- dirt don't hurt
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 2 2010
-- Melissa Wiley